Archive for October 2011

2nd day

I jus had 3 cigarrete today..n im starting to feel weak n weaker..i need sleep..with this uneasy feeling..sigh..i jus can see whats waiting for me in 5 years time..hmm

Scared

this is not something ull get wen u went for a horror movie in the cinema, this is different from u've been chase by some sick psycho. hm all i can do now is pray to GOD that everything's gonna be alright..i cant do anything , that feeling had already emerged in u..maybe the time will come someday..hm nothing more to say..and when the time comes, ill be in my own misery life again..no hope, no feelings..

Weak

Today is day 2 my life without cigarette..its ok since last nite..but today my throat started swellin..and i know im about to have a cold..hate it wen this side effects wen ure trying to do sumthing good wit life..

Im just lay down for a while coz my body is getting weak..hm plus missing sum1..sigh..hope she's doing fine..

Coax

Hmm i dont know how,but i did it again..am i too dumb??please god help me with this coax-ing stuff..let me learn n use it..hm ive been facing a lot of trouble bcause of this coax thingy..

Hurm yes..i do not know how to "pujuk2"..n im trying my best to "pujuk" and to learn..hmm i did my best not to start a quarrel n try to be calm..but nothing seems to work..hm if u only knew wat id do for u..hm

Im still in the learning process but y ure being so mean?u shud consider me as a student who tries to accepting a new thing..all im asking is a chance..let me learn..u cant judge me if u know dat im still learning on this coax-ing stuff..hm

Now wat m i goin to do?i missed ya..but yet..u off ur phne..or mybe watching dat horror movie..hm i jus miss u so much..n yes ill do it here..im so sorry because wat ive said earlier today..i didnt mean to be like that..i just wanna express my feelings..thats all..

Ive been doing a lot of thinkin,n i wont say or express anything again..coz i dont wanna break ur heart or havin dat cute quarrel of ours..

Ill bear it on my own..i jus wanted for u to be happy..not sulk all day,mad at me all day.. Again,im so sorry love..

cigarettes free..


hehe this is a nice topic neway..ahaks..so how many of people in this world smokes?hehe i dunno how many but i sure know that there's a billion or trillion of people who smokes in this world.and im practically of the billion and trillions and a heavy one.i smoke wen im bored, wen im stress, when im happy, if u knew me then ull know how heavy i am with cigarette.

huhuh but today i wanna share my new determination on quitting.it may looks ridiculous but im gonna go for it. for the sake of my loved one's..huhuh it may take a while but ill trying my best to quit okay..?so for today..i only wanna smoke about 4 - 5 cigarette..heee..i jus cant do it alone and ill need sum help and support.

peace out

internet oh internet


Its been 2 weeks since the last good connection of internet i have..sigh..wat the hell is wrong with the network now??im not an internet addict but sumhow i need the internet for my assignment and finding information.dear anybody..can uu please check wat the hell is going on with the i-dont-know-wat in your place?????


Breakfast for champs




Im gonna make it up to u



LOVE U SO MUCH SAYANG..if ure watchiing this..it really reminds me of u..n i missed u so much...

Baby

miss Whitey

How would any of us think of a child?i mean our own??mostly some people dun like it wen it comes to this "talk" about having a family but sure dats not me..come to think of it..im aging and still i dont have my own family..SIGH..

sharing again my freakin weird thoughts..but it seems like i cant wait to haave my own kid..where i can play around..whom i can cuddle with..hug everytime i come home from work..it must be a great feeling ait..?? yes im a junior..n im still a student but i cant stop thinkin bout this..i wanna really wanna speed my study get a work..then marryin my princess and start a lil family..i even had this name if its a girl..lol..ill make sure dats my baby will get dat name for sure..yeah..hee


peace out

Dear Mr Alien


Dear Mr alien..

im writting this letter to u just to say hello and need a favor from u guys.i really need my BRAIN back from your possession. i cant do anything right without my BRAIN.can u imagine life without BRAIN??yeap thats me and u shud reconsidered on keeping my BRAIN.for this quite while i havent really care bout it..but sumhow this morning i realized that i need it back..im depending on u to send me back that BRAIN so i could use it sumhow in this life..thanks.hope that ill get ur attention and reconsideration..


sincerely : 
me

How to Love


through out the day

Reach kl at 1am and there she was in sum leopard jacket n pants..waiting for me..really missed her..
then went for a quick late dinner at kepong..and she was late to go to her frenz' place..
then she give me a quick warning.. " do0nt forget tomorrow at 6 am okay"

went straight home and lepak with my boys..all gossiipping about nothing until 4 sumthing then they all went to bed except for me..whos kinda afraid to sleep cause im da kinda of guy who cant really get up even my place was on fire..

530 am : went out to get to her frenz place and pick up her..my phone rang and it was her..

"kat mne?"
"dah nk sampai" i replied..

reach at her frenz place 6 am on the spot..and there she was waiting for me in a black dress..i was talking to myself.."wow she look great..so cute and so gorgeous that i dont wanna blink my eyes.." even though i didnt have the chance to say dat to her but i know she knows..

it was around 7 and we head to Mcd in damansara for breakfast..all the time i was happy to see her and all i can jus think is how cute she is dat morn..

i was thinkin to myself how lucky i am to have her beside me and i swear to myself that ill be the best for u in anyway.. I LOVE U SO MUCH



we have a chit chat for about 3 hours at that same Mcd and then we decided to move on..we decided to go to college to see my dear old lecturer Mr Mus but he was not around..went to TS for a movie..REAL STEEL..i cant even concentrate on the movie and i just wanna see her face..how beautiful she was dat day..how lovely she was..LOVE U SO MUCH..

after that movie which of i dont quite understand (owh darn i forgot to bring her for lunch) and then she started stomachaching for some time..(felt guilty for dat..sorry syg)we went to college again to see Mr. Mus..after a few chat (he was in hurry tho) then we took a lrt to puduraya to buy my ticket..starting at that point i was kinda sad coz i know dat ill leave her alone..hmm wish if i dont have that stupid oathtaking..SH**T



went straight to kepong after dat ticketing thingy..had a late lunch with her and donald at 540 pm and she was already weak coz of the stomachache..she wont even eat..and she wanted to stay in the car..felt guilty for that..

It was too early and then she decided to go for another movie at the curve..we tag donald along for the movie.."the thing" was choosen for our 2nd movie. i fell asleep the whole 45 mins before the movie ended..(too tired) but still im happy coz she beside me.. : D



after the movie we drop off donald at kepong the we head on straight to puduraya..on the way to pudu i dont say a word coz i cant stand the feeling of im leaving her again..hmm plus she was all weak .. she didnt eat anything..hm n im quite worried..

1130 pm : its was time to part with her..and i still cant say a word except for i love u and how i dont wanna go home dat nite..hm I REALLY MISSED U..i asked her to went straight to the car coz i cant stand with her being beside the bus to wait for me to leave..hm ILL ALWAYS LOVE U MY PRINCESS








Cant sleep

sigh..still cant sleep after a while..and i manage to settle my background video for my next assignment..then add up with the video that im going to shoot and Walaaa...hehe works like a charm..but still im kinda worried though coz i cant sleep normal like other people..sigh..hu within the next hour i must get some sleep..and i really hope that today will come to an end coz i cant really wait to see my CIK BUNGE..hehe mwuah wait for me k sayang..yeeeeehaaaa

Cant wait




yosh just wanna share my happiness waiting for tomorrow to be with my love..
hehe wait for me okay cik BUNGE CHANTIK..love u so much..dying to see her 
after her last visit to png which was like 2 weeks ago..sigh..its only been 2 weeks but 
for me its like 2 years..haiyoo..
hehe MWUAH2 love u sayang..

Thank You

thanks for loving me CK BUNGE CHANTIK.
u mean the world to me
LOVE U LAH..

I MISS U


sleep..

cant stand it anymore..i need sum sleep..been waiting for a while..sigh..

I DO IT FOR U


RIGHT HERE WAITING..


well the songs tells it all..listen to every word..

LOVE U


LOVE

video

Headache


hurm F**KIN HEADACHE is all i wanna say..but still i manage to settle my 3D modelling..phew..

Mother



"Blessed is your face

Blessed is your name

My beloved

Blessed is your smile
Which makes my soul want to fly
My beloved
All the nights
And all the times
That you cared for me
But i never realised it"



sumhow i missed my parent which are now in the States..Forgive me "mama" and "papa" if anything ive done is not accordingly to your teachings , your guidance. Im trying my best to be the son uve always wanted me to be..please forgive me of all my sins to u guys and i will try not to break your heart again..I promise that ill love u like u always loved me..and ill sure dedicate my whole life to take care for u all LOVE U 2 SO MUCH





IF..

video

This evening i jus past out without any warning..dang..dunno y..my brother's not at home and i jus blank and went to the ground..sigh lucky me coz im in my own room..


Boys Dont Cry


video



Wew...

Usually in this life we often see girls cry if they are depressed , sad or happy but still if u guys see a male homo sapiens is crying, then there must be a reason coz boys dont just cry without any reason..so think back if u see
a male version of homo sapiens crying sumwhere..its not about ego or wanna control their macho-ness but they only cry only if there's a good reason..

and if there's any male version of this kind who said they doesnt cry or cant cry then maybe u should consider to ask ur frenz to go for a check.


Left Out


Sumtimes i feel like im being left out..sigh..

i dont mind being left out coz i like to be alone rather than being with other people in this world..but sumhow if "she" did it..my worlds become's this giant empty space and makes me suffocate..n i cant stand even one moment if she is hectic with her work..
haizzzzzz....


jemmm sudaaaa

Captive Mind

Just wanna share my thoughts since i cant really sleep and im still waiting for my lovely princess to call..





Have u guys ever thought that we are still are in state of "captive mind" even the colonialism is over??How many of us realized or aware that we are still in colonized subtlety??? Yes do think about it again..
even we are free and even our country has been independent for 54 years but we still live in fear and under this state of "colonialism".We are bind , born to be captivated in our early lives.

Let me give u guys a simple example of how we are still under it and im sorry if its not u..but mostly our Malaysian people are.

e.g 1

"ko minat team bola mne yer?"
"mestila team arsenal" (arsenal people dont get mad - im just giving example)

Did we ever to like our own team??or our state team?? if some of u said yes..its just because the Malaysian team are now more shinning than they used to be..so its okay i guess but still we flare-up other team rather than our own team.

e.g 2

A guy walks in to our place and wearing a bundled clothes..than what do we say about him/her???

"ape barang pakai barang bundle..orang skarang pkai levis ori" 

yes despite that WE Malaysian are becoming a high living entity but still y cant we flare-up our own brand?our own design?our own national pride??it is a fear of becoming left out if ure not following the "waves".

eheheh..just wanna share my thoughts tho..if u dont like it do correct me..ive been thinking this for years and like the late sociologist, Syed Hussein Alatas pointed out how dangerous the CAPTIVE MIND is as it  plagues the developing world. ( actually i just found out that Allahyarham Syed Hussein Alatas wrote this).

think about it..

" A CAPTIVE MIND IS UNCREATIVE AND INCAPABLE OF RAISING ORIGINALS PROBLEM "
                                                                                                           - Allahyarham Syed Hussein Alatas








My Princess

this song is for u..ull know wenever ill post this up dat means dat i really miss u..
mwuah love u..

i know this is not ur type of songs to be romantic and stuff..but the lyrics really mean alot to me..
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c4O17AQpQKA

Daily Routine.


Jus wanna share my daily routine throughout the day..

6 am : wake up and settle all my prayers..
7 am : send my brother to his school..
8 am : will be washing the dishes (if theres any) or housework
9 am : sitting in front my lappy and doing some work..
10 am : NAP..
1 pm : pickup my lil bro from school
2 pm : cook sumthing for him or buy for lunch
3 pm : sitting in front of my lappy again
4 pm : leave early for class (lepakking at mamak for a drink)
5 pm : class till 10

11 pm : chat with my parents
12 pm maybe a lil chat with my LOVE

1 - 6 am : sleep (but still i dont have any specific time SIGH)


FLY...

Dang...


a fly jus went straight into my Mocha...SIGH !@#$%^&*(

electricity

had a busy day today..going to SK SG RUSA to collect my questionnaires but sumhow wen i got back from the school..i dont hear a thing from inside my house..came in then..i asked to my lil bro who doesnt go to school with an excuse of today is PMR...


"der takdak api ka?"
then he replied "xdak.."

then i sat in my room and finished my assignment..after a few while it was okay..then i waited till 3pm and yet there's no sign of the electricity coming back on..

lepakking at my moms gazebo for a while and at last i cant stand it anymore..y these days nothing happens without a notice????!!!then i got up and call the T** for further information on how this delay will be due..after a few chit chat..and the operator said dat its gonna be like 7 hours of breakdown..come on la..im doing sumthing and i f**kin need the freakin internet..sigh..i thought to myself.."i gotta go sumwhere with an internet connection...
well then here i am ..lepakking at Coffee Bean at Queensbay writing this up

peace yall...

a lil notice wont your damn company to loose Billions..



Missing you..

writing again with a hot milo and "pembunuh bersiri "

had the most unforgettable memories and the best of all..yeah...hehe thanks pumpkin..
usually i never write this up..but jus wanna say dat i really missed you..sigh..huhuh
n thanks for spending time with me..LOVE u so much-LAH..