I jus had 3 cigarrete today..n im starting to feel weak n weaker..i need sleep..with this uneasy feeling..sigh..i jus can see whats waiting for me in 5 years time..hmm

this is not something ull get wen u went for a horror movie in the cinema, this is different from u've been chase by some sick psycho. hm all i can do now is pray to GOD that everything's gonna be alright..i cant do anything , that feeling had already emerged in u..maybe the time will come someday..hm nothing more to say..and when the time comes, ill be in my own misery life again..no hope, no feelings..

Today is day 2 my life without cigarette..its ok since last nite..but today my throat started swellin..and i know im about to have a cold..hate it wen this side effects wen ure trying to do sumthing good wit life..

Im just lay down for a while coz my body is getting weak..hm plus missing sum1..sigh..hope she's doing fine..

Hmm i dont know how,but i did it again..am i too dumb??please god help me with this coax-ing stuff..let me learn n use it..hm ive been facing a lot of trouble bcause of this coax thingy..

Hurm yes..i do not know how to "pujuk2"..n im trying my best to "pujuk" and to learn..hmm i did my best not to start a quarrel n try to be calm..but nothing seems to work..hm if u only knew wat id do for u..hm

Im still in the learning process but y ure being so mean?u shud consider me as a student who tries to accepting a new thing..all im asking is a chance..let me learn..u cant judge me if u know dat im still learning on this coax-ing stuff..hm

Now wat m i goin to do?i missed ya..but yet..u off ur phne..or mybe watching dat horror movie..hm i jus miss u so much..n yes ill do it here..im so sorry because wat ive said earlier today..i didnt mean to be like that..i just wanna express my feelings..thats all..

Ive been doing a lot of thinkin,n i wont say or express anything again..coz i dont wanna break ur heart or havin dat cute quarrel of ours..

Ill bear it on my own..i jus wanted for u to be happy..not sulk all day,mad at me all day.. Again,im so sorry love..

huhuh but today i wanna share my new determination on quitting.it may looks ridiculous but im gonna go for it. for the sake of my loved one's..huhuh it may take a while but ill trying my best to quit okay..?so for today..i only wanna smoke about 4 - 5 cigarette..heee..i jus cant do it alone and ill need sum help and support.

peace out

How would any of us think of a child?i mean our own??mostly some people dun like it wen it comes to this "talk" about having a family but sure dats not me..come to think of it..im aging and still i dont have my own family..SIGH..

sharing again my freakin weird thoughts..but it seems like i cant wait to haave my own kid..where i can play around..whom i can cuddle with..hug everytime i come home from work..it must be a great feeling ait..?? yes im a junior..n im still a student but i cant stop thinkin bout this..i wanna really wanna speed my study get a work..then marryin my princess and start a lil family..i even had this name if its a girl..lol..ill make sure dats my baby will get dat name for sure..yeah..hee


peace out

Dear Mr alien..

im writting this letter to u just to say hello and need a favor from u guys.i really need my BRAIN back from your possession. i cant do anything right without my BRAIN.can u imagine life without BRAIN??yeap thats me and u shud reconsidered on keeping my BRAIN.for this quite while i havent really care bout it..but sumhow this morning i realized that i need it back..im depending on u to send me back that BRAIN so i could use it sumhow in this life..thanks.hope that ill get ur attention and reconsideration..

Reach kl at 1am and there she was in sum leopard jacket n pants..waiting for me..really missed her..
then went for a quick late dinner at kepong..and she was late to go to her frenz' place..
then she give me a quick warning.. " do0nt forget tomorrow at 6 am okay"

went straight home and lepak with my boys..all gossiipping about nothing until 4 sumthing then they all went to bed except for me..whos kinda afraid to sleep cause im da kinda of guy who cant really get up even my place was on fire..

530 am : went out to get to her frenz place and pick up her..my phone rang and it was her..

"kat mne?"
"dah nk sampai" i replied..

reach at her frenz place 6 am on the spot..and there she was waiting for me in a black dress..i was talking to myself.."wow she look great..so cute and so gorgeous that i dont wanna blink my eyes.." even though i didnt have the chance to say dat to her but i know she knows..

it was around 7 and we head to Mcd in damansara for breakfast..all the time i was happy to see her and all i can jus think is how cute she is dat morn..

i was thinkin to myself how lucky i am to have her beside me and i swear to myself that ill be the best for u in anyway.. I LOVE U SO MUCH

we have a chit chat for about 3 hours at that same Mcd and then we decided to move on..we decided to go to college to see my dear old lecturer Mr Mus but he was not around..went to TS for a movie..REAL STEEL..i cant even concentrate on the movie and i just wanna see her face..how beautiful she was dat day..how lovely she was..LOVE U SO MUCH..

after that movie which of i dont quite understand (owh darn i forgot to bring her for lunch) and then she started stomachaching for some time..(felt guilty for dat..sorry syg)we went to college again to see Mr. Mus..after a few chat (he was in hurry tho) then we took a lrt to puduraya to buy my ticket..starting at that point i was kinda sad coz i know dat ill leave her alone..hmm wish if i dont have that stupid oathtaking..SH**T



went straight to kepong after dat ticketing thingy..had a late lunch with her and donald at 540 pm and she was already weak coz of the stomachache..she wont even eat..and she wanted to stay in the car..felt guilty for that..

It was too early and then she decided to go for another movie at the curve..we tag donald along for the movie.."the thing" was choosen for our 2nd movie. i fell asleep the whole 45 mins before the movie ended..(too tired) but still im happy coz she beside me.. : D



after the movie we drop off donald at kepong the we head on straight to puduraya..on the way to pudu i dont say a word coz i cant stand the feeling of im leaving her again..hmm plus she was all weak .. she didnt eat anything..hm n im quite worried..

1130 pm : its was time to part with her..and i still cant say a word except for i love u and how i dont wanna go home dat nite..hm I REALLY MISSED U..i asked her to went straight to the car coz i cant stand with her being beside the bus to wait for me to leave..hm ILL ALWAYS LOVE U MY PRINCESS

sigh..still cant sleep after a while..and i manage to settle my background video for my next assignment..then add up with the video that im going to shoot and Walaaa...hehe works like a charm..but still im kinda worried though coz i cant sleep normal like other people..sigh..hu within the next hour i must get some sleep..and i really hope that today will come to an end coz i cant really wait to see my CIK BUNGE..hehe mwuah wait for me k sayang..yeeeeehaaaa

Which makes my soul want to fly

My beloved

All the nights

And all the times

That you cared for me

But i never realised it"

This evening i jus past out without any warning..dang..dunno y..my brother's not at home and i jus blank and went to the ground..sigh lucky me coz im in my own room..

Wew...

Usually in this life we often see girls cry if they are depressed , sad or happy but still if u guys see a male homo sapiens is crying, then there must be a reason coz boys dont just cry without any reason..so think back if u see
a male version of homo sapiens crying sumwhere..its not about ego or wanna control their macho-ness but they only cry only if there's a good reason..

and if there's any male version of this kind who said they doesnt cry or cant cry then maybe u should consider to ask ur frenz to go for a check.

Sumtimes i feel like im being left out..sigh..

i dont mind being left out coz i like to be alone rather than being with other people in this world..but sumhow if "she" did it..my worlds become's this giant empty space and makes me suffocate..n i cant stand even one moment if she is hectic with her work..
haizzzzzz....


jemmm sudaaaa

Just wanna share my thoughts since i cant really sleep and im still waiting for my lovely princess to call..

this song is for u..ull know wenever ill post this up dat means dat i really miss u..
mwuah love u..

i know this is not ur type of songs to be romantic and stuff..but the lyrics really mean alot to me..
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c4O17AQpQKA

Jus wanna share my daily routine throughout the day..

6 am : wake up and settle all my prayers..
7 am : send my brother to his school..
8 am : will be washing the dishes (if theres any) or housework
9 am : sitting in front my lappy and doing some work..
10 am : NAP..
1 pm : pickup my lil bro from school
2 pm : cook sumthing for him or buy for lunch
3 pm : sitting in front of my lappy again
4 pm : leave early for class (lepakking at mamak for a drink)
5 pm : class till 10

11 pm : chat with my parents
12 pm maybe a lil chat with my LOVE

1 - 6 am : sleep (but still i dont have any specific time SIGH)

Dang...

had a busy day today..going to SK SG RUSA to collect my questionnaires but sumhow wen i got back from the school..i dont hear a thing from inside my house..came in then..i asked to my lil bro who doesnt go to school with an excuse of today is PMR...

had the most unforgettable memories and the best of all..yeah...hehe thanks pumpkin..